POEM: LET ME SENSE THE CHAOS

photo by Alex Lear

 

 

 

 

 

 

let me sense the chaos

   a semi-autobiography 

   (based on the mca jimi @ woodstock CD)

 

 

            And those who took away our Voice

                                    Are now surprised

            They couldn't take away our Song.

                                                 --Kofi Anyidoho

  

1.

 

in the news

            every

day

the blk world

 

gasping

 

fragmented / confused

 

trying

to grasp

itself

 

confused / fragmented

 

fresh murders

marbling the sidewalks

of our psyches

in an indelible redness

no future sun can bleach

 

            "in Rwanda

            ten thousand dead

            in one day"


 

2.

 

i know that bosnia is bad

but have you seen liberia

have you heard haiti

been seized by rio's preteen

street grown gangstas

or ingested the platinum

raps of inner city america

celebrating its own depravity

 

today's blkness

makes humpty dumpty look whole

 


3.

 

we are

the palsied palms

 

of ex-chattel

picking melodies

 

african black

& mulatto

 

intermixed with the eye tears

of murdered cherokee

 

& dappled

by the martial noise

 

from motley strains

of conquering caucasians

 

chortling praise

to their bellicose god

 

            this mixture is the indigo matrix

            of my muse's midnight hue

 

 


4.

 

have we survived the past

only to give up the present

 

the speedy spin

of integration

flings us

 

away from groundings

with our people

 

a chocolate despair consumes

our sweetness

leaving the dry bones

of neglected unity

disconnected & rotted

 

is the bottom line higher

than the common good

 


5.

 

i have a new cd

of ancestral soundz

previously unreleased

 

roaring strings timbred to a keening

juice of electric hurling through

           

akin to the incredible jism jerk

of groin muscles shooting off

 

i needed to make this hollering

this ghostly heart cry

 

loudly

leaping

through

the thick

of rhythms'

din

 

there is

always a need

to assert

humanness

 

to cry

to announce

            i am

 

 


6.

 

the road to life

is no gentle path

birth is a renting of flesh

a messy letting

of dangerous blood

rife with pain & promise

 

& ultimately

merely momentary existence

amidst the vastness

of eternity

 

 

 


7.


within the cruelty of this

avaricious modernity

 

life's mystery

is the capacity of color

to forge beauty

from the chaos

 

the simple courage

to shed

systemic chicness

& stand unshod

 

authoring the gospel

of musical creativity

 


8.

 

such singing

 

whether with others

with orchestra

with hand instruments

or single voice alone

 

such singing is answer

is signpost

 

signifying

we've found a sound

 

that turns the temporary

of today's tough earth

into a life long

spiritual home

 

 


9.

 

without dark sound sanctuary

nurturing imagination

 

my future is limited

to this tone deaf present

 

except within vibrant

hymnal shelter

 

how else can

my soul survive

 

 


10.

 

yes

 

let me sense the chaos

listen

to my blues resound

 

let me sense the chaos

i will respond

with a song

 

let me

sense the chaos

 

why else

 

was i

born

 

 —kalamu ya salaam